Recommended Reading From Waiting, Dating, & Mating

With the dating series wrapping up I wanted to give you some great resources to help you study further. Here are some great books, articles, and videos to help keep the conversation going.

Sex, Dating, and Relationships: A Fresh Approach by Gerald Hiestand and Jay Thomas

I can’t recommend this book enough. If you can only afford one book to purchase of this post it should be this one. The authors take a look at this subject from the most biblical lenses possible. Even when it is inconvenient or not popular, they just present to you what the scripture actually says. This book is direct, blunt, but full of grace and mercy. They don’t live in a bubble and they understand the reality of sin and its effect on our lives. The book is laid out in a way that each chapter builds on the previous one and it is lined with bits of humor and illustrations. So it isn’t a hard read. The book is about 150 pages long so it isn’t a long read either. Seriously, get this book. 

Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship by Joshua Harris

I read I Kissed Dating Goodbye when I was younger. It left a bad taste in my mouth (pun intended). I know many people have openly said they would never read anything by Joshua Harris because of the way his first book left them. My old senior pastor often makes jokes about how, as he has grown in his faith, he doesn’t agree with everything he has written in his first book. Neither does Joshua Harris. He has said he has learned a lot since writing that book. This book is good and has lots of great principles. The main thing you should take from this book is that premature, short-term romantic attachments can be a big distraction from serving God. There are some great practical points in this book and the love story in the early chapters may be the most romantic thing you have ever read.

When God writes your love story: The Ultimate Approach to Guy/Girl Relationships by Eric & Leslie Ludy

If you don’t know about the Ludys, you need to get to know them! Eric Ludy has one of the most powerful messages on the gospel I have ever heard. This book is practical and real. Real life issues and real life answers. This book has a lot of story telling from personal experience that may be a bit too much for some readers. If you can get passed some of the long-winded stories and see the content for what it is, it shares that rules alone won't stop people from falling into sexual sin and foolishness but rather a love for God will help safeguard you from those temptations.

Meet Mr. Smith: Revolutionize the Way You Think About Sex, Purity, and Romance by Eric & Leslie Ludy

Again, writing style aside, this book is great. My favorite part was chapter 19 where the author answers very candid questions about sex, lust, and purity. The book is full of grace and mercy like their other books. Worthy work on the subject of sex and purity.

Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is): Sexual Purity in a Lust-Saturated World by Jousha Harris

When I saw that Albert Mohler and John Piper gave this book a recommendation I had to check it out. Joshua Harris is often labeled as a legalist because of the things he has done personally to make war with lust. I have stated my opinion on Harris already but something needs to be added about this notion. Legalism is legalism when someone says that in order to be a Christian you have to add to the gospel (dress a certain way, behave a certain way, do certain things, etc.) Harris does not do that. He understands the gravity of lust and his own sin and makes war with it in a way that he feels kills that sin in him. If there is sin you need to make war with, it may look different how you deal with it than how someone else deals with it. This little book is great and has practical ways to fight lust in your heart.

Passion and Purity: Learning to Bring Your Love Life Under Christ’s Control by Elisabeth Elliot

Long before Joshua Harris wrote I Kissed Dating Goodbye, the book to read about purity and romance was Passion and Purity. The point of the book isn’t to mimic her relationship with Jim Elliot. It is to get the principles that are laid out in this book to apply to your life. Great work, worth reading and discussing.

What He Must Be:...If He Wants to Marry My Daughter by Voddie Baucham Jr.

Parents! I can’t shout the praises of this book enough! This is more than a check list. You don’t have to have a daughter to appreciate this book. This will encourage you to be a better parent. This book has already had done a huge work in my own life and I am not even a parent yet.

10 Myths About Sex & Relationships Among Emerging Adults by BJ Stockman

The New Modesty Makeover (Relevant Magazine)

The Other Side of Modesty (The Rebelution)

The Gospel and Modesty - David Platt

What Guys Think About Modesty.

Jessica Rey - The evolution of the swimsuit

Porn-Again Christian (Free E-book by Mark Driscoll)

7 Negative Effects of Porn (BJ Stockman)

9 Ways To Fight The Temptation of Pornography (BJ Stockman) 


Frank Gil